Nebraska Senator’s lawsuit against God dismissed
Douglas County district court judge Marlon Polk tossed out Senator Ernie Chambers’ lawsuit to stop God being such a badass, citing difficulties in serving the suit to the defendant.
Given that this court finds that there can never be service effectuated on the named defendant this action will be dismissed with prejudice.
the judge wrote.
Ernie would have none of it, however.
The court itself acknowledges the existence of God,” he said. “A consequence of that acknowledgment is a recognition of God’s omniscience.”
Therefore, “since God knows everything, God has notice of this lawsuit”, he added.
Fair enough. God certainly knows what Ernie’s up to, and has no doubt had his name removed the guest list at the pearly gates. Now, was the issue about the lawsuit not being servable that the court didn’t know where God lives (Heaven) or that they’re not sure he’s listening (totally debatable)? Neither protest holds water, if you’re already acknowledging God’s existence. How many times does it say exactly where God is in the Bible, ten thousand?
I am with you, dumbass.
Genesis 26:24
Genesis 28:15
Joshua 3:7
1 Samuel 14:7
2 Kings 10:15
Isaiah 41:10
Isaiah 43:5
Jeremiah 1:8
Like and so on and so forth. So it wasn’t that. Anybody can consult the yellow pages of God’s whereabouts that is the Holy Bible and locate him pretty fast. Unless, of course…
The alternative interpretation of the judge’s reason for tossing the case is that he doesn’t think there is a God. What were his exact words?
…this court finds that there can never be service effectuated on the named defendant…
Meaning we can never advise Him of the lawsuit, not because we don’t know where he is, but because he doesn’t exist.
I think the fine state of Nebraska just set a legal precedent for the official non-existence of God. I will email the judge and follow up to see which interpretation is correct, but let me prematurely say “Way to go, atheist state of Nebraska!” And way to go, Senator. He’s the second highest ranking public official to go on the record in the US as a non-theist. 
The mayhem Senator Chambers sought to prevent—fearsome floods, horrendous hurricanes, and the like—by way of legal action will continue, at least until God confirms He’s aware of the lawsuit.
[...] strikes again! On Monday, a Dubai DJ reporting on Senator Ernie Chambers’ recently-dismissed lawsuit against God, joked around pretending he was on the phone with The Big Guy. Under a barrage [...]
Posted by Topic Agnostic » Blog Archive » Virgin Radio Dubai fires DJ for going off on Senator Chambers’ God lawsuit on October 23rd, 2008 7:53 pm